Tag Archives: depression

A 19 year old’s view of how kindness and empathy are our strongest weapons in the fight against mental health problems.

Guest post by Himanshu Pande

A lot of things recently hit my mind when the topic about ‘Depression’ ‘Suicide’ or ‘Suicidal Tendencies’ was brought upon. To be vulnerably honest I myself am Depressed and Suicidal and I find it really hard to talk to someone about it for several reasons. Today, when I woke up in the morning, I read about the tragic death of Chester Bennington(Linkin Park Lead Vocalist) and I was devastated and heartbroken and as I was reading the posts on social media I found some very unpleasantly rough comments about people committing suicide which stated that suicide is ‘Cowardly’ and ‘People with depression need to get over it and not destroy others lives by killing themselves.’ 

I first would like to put forth the fact that depression is not just the matter of feeling sad and being suicidal is not something that just comes up out of the blue. In my experience it is years of pain and personal struggle that puts a person in a situation he can’t run from. For most, suicide is the way of ending the pain they feel and it’s understandable that it is a Permanent action to a temporary problem, but why should anyone call it an act of cowards? Taking your own life is an act of cowards? Are you kidding me? “Suicide is Cowardly” inspires shame and it does not really make sense, most people fear death and I’m not trying to call suicide brave or courageous but overcoming the fear of death does not strike me as cowardly. It only means that the pain incurred by the disease inspires the need to relieve onself which is stronger than the fear of death. That only explains the gravity of the situation, the need for desperate measures to be taken to help people going through this life threatening disease that so easily gets camoflauged in everyday life. 

There are ways in which we can help the ones feeling that way but sometimes the message goes in the wrong direction. “I want to kill myself “ these five words are a shock to hear and a dreadful pronouncement from a person you don’t want to lose and leaves you with the question “How could they want to die?” Calling it an act of cowards or telling them that “Things could be worse” doesn’t help at all. It only leaves them in a more difficult position. Any emotional thought can come to you and as we all are humans over here we can feel betrayed, angry, lost, sad, hurt, but we can’t control the emotions flowing in our heads. What a person can control is his action and response towards a certain activity. If someone discloses you that they are suicidal and you think you really want to help, please ask yourself the question ‘How should I help him without causing any harm to his mind?’ and then go for it. If you really think that you want to make people stop thinking about suicide the quintessential thing is to stop making people feel bad about them, stop the ruthless act of bullying or body shaming. 

If you care about someone let them know that you’re there for them whether depressed or not.

Depression or suicidal thoughts don’t look for a person’s status and can happen to anyone. If by any chance you think that the jokes you make or the friendly insults you sue for your friends and other loved ones is hurting them in some way, please stop using them. Depression doesn’t discriminate. If you care about someone let them know that you’re there for them whether depressed or not. Be kind to every person you know because it is necessary. Suicide is the 10th leading cause of death in the world which in some years might end up as the leading cause. What does it take to be a nice person? Nothing. Even if you’re not in touch with someone you care let them know that you’re there for them and trust me nothing is better than hearing these words from a person you care for. 

Mental health has to be taken more seriously

Make every day a Mental Health Day and change the way you look at a person suffering from a mental health disorder. Lend a helping hand and stop the reckless acts of discrimination and bullying. Stop insulting people for the things they don’t have a remind them in pleasant way of all the good things they have. Take some action against these bullies who take Mental Health Disorders as a joke or as a disease that doesn’t matter and more importantly fight for yourself and the ones you love and rise. Let this message go viral and reach every corner of the world that mental health has to be taken more seriously. 

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Emptiness.

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One Saturday morning you wake up to this disgusting feeling, like someone stole your intestines? Nope that’s too much. Like someone stole this peace which is in your gut. Yeah exactly.

It’ s one of the most awkward feelings one can ever go through. And i’m there in the shower telling my brain “Dude. Come on. We’re already all worked up with a million things on our to-do list. You really wanna play this crap?” Perhaps, the heart wants what it wants (No no no. Not a Selena Gomez fan.)

No matter how much you try to get yourself distracted by stuff, the emptiness that has taken your world for a monster ride isn’t ending and heading nowhere! You clean the bookshelf, you do every god damn work you had kept pending since 2001 . Nope not working.

Let’s try to figure this one out.

Once upon a time there was a girl named Sia. Sia was a sucker for beautiful leaves. Every morning Sia would go to school and by the time she came back she would often bring two or three beautiful leaves and keep them in a box. Days came  when Sia was so busy that she would often slightly open the small tin box in which she kept the leaves, quickly put the leaves inside and close it. Eventually Sia started noticing a foul smell in her room everyday. One Sunday morning she opened her box of leaves only to find her leaves withering and rotten. 

Devastating? Yes it was for her. Why? Because the leaves that she collected were often the only good that happened to her throughout the day. Why couldn’t she take care of it? She thought keeping the leaves in a box would preserve them but only heaven knows how wrong she was. 

“Grandma. My leaves. My leaves are rotten and gone! ” cried Sia almost disappearing into grandma’s arms. The only thing grandma had to say was

“Sia. If ever you love something, never try to hoard. If ever you hate something, never try to hoard it too. Anything  that is hoarded rots. Whether good or bad and it never does any good.” 

So YOU need to stop. Whether it’s the happy feelings or the sad ones. Crazy thoughts or the happy ones. Jot it down, sing it out. Dance it off or play it up. Anyway, do not hoard it. Don not let it stay. Because this emptiness in the gut is actually emptiness in the brain that can never bring any good.

So if you love them. Tell them. If you dislike them, stay away from them. If it hurts, nurture it. If it makes you happy, let the world know. No matter what, feelings like chocolates shouldn’t be ignored (you are going to hell for ignoring chocolates)

It doesn’t let you do what you want, live how  you can . And one day it strikes you like thunder and lightning and all you understand is that ‘someone just stole my intestine’. So save your intestines before you lose you butt.

Love,

Nidhi

xoxoxox

You are a woman and it’s not a shame TO BE!

Lol. Provocative isn’t it? the heading?

In every walk of life you face it. The whole sexism thing is the sickliest that could ever have happened. Yes my dear, sexism is sickly, not being a woman!

I was blessed enough to be born in this family where we were always treated as equals. Me and my brother. In fact there are times when i feel my parents end up spending less on my brother and more on me!

The point which prevails is are we equals?

Yes! We are! We were created together and i sincerely doubt the greatest of all artists, the maker of universe, the giver of life, the architect the God as we call could have ever been narrow minded.

Anyway not getting into this whole thing ( i could write a god damn book and feel it’s still not enough) let us move ahead.

It is our responsibility to tell our daughters and wives and nieces and sisters and most importantly our friends that being a woman is nothing to be ashamed of.

People will try to pull you down, you might not be paid as must as your male colleagues, they will laugh at you, sometimes cat call at other times insult you and be certainly demeaning.

YOU DON’T HAVE TO STOP!

You cannot teach people a lesson by going to them and explaining them the whole thing. Lol. Seriously you thought of that? These people have gone to school and have read books, watched television and they are aware of what is right and what is wrong. The sad reality is that they CHOOSE  to be wrong. You cannot help someone who has chosen to be wrong.

Just because you like pizza, am i allowed to shove it down your throat? No? exactly. A woman likes sex but no one is calling to be eve teased or molested or raped.

What can you do?

  • If you feel it’s severe. Report to the police.
  • Tell your family so that they are aware of any trouble you’ve been in.
  • There’s nothing to be ashamed of being in trouble. Your family and friends know how the world is.
  • You need to feel sorry for people who are wrong. YOU DON’T HAVE TO FEEL SORRY FOR YOURSELF
  • DO NOT GET DEPRESSED
  • There are good people in this world and there is still hope.
  • Don’t keep it in you and let it eat yourself up
  • You are not just a pretty face. You are not the small boobs, big ass or whatever they call you. No body is perfect and there is no prototype for perfect. There are examples of being inhuman, which are those people who DO NOT deserve your attention
  • They shouldn’t be the last thing you think of, before falling off to sleep.

You might be wondering how am i able to write precisely about it. Because i have felt it and gone through it. I know how it feels and i know that this is a very common thing. I have ruined my nights and i have exploited my days. But i have learnt how to live. I have grown out of it and i am not looking back. Never.